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The big secret nobody wants to tell | Bruce Muzik | TEDxSinCity

23101 ratings | 3012793 views
Bruce Muzik presents a riveting talk about the devastating impact that withholding secrets can have on our lives and what to do about it. Bruce Muzik is a world class trainer and speaker. He is known as the "white man that lived for 6 months in a black ghetto" in post-apartheid South Africa. His passion is having people experience unprecedented freedom and happiness, through being Authentic. Find out more about Bruce at http://www.brucemuzik.com. About TEDx, x = independently organized event In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized., (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)
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Text Comments (2503)
Binguh Bungah (8 days ago)
I love how he still chokes when he mentions the kid that told him welcome home. "From the mouth of babes..." God bless the child
Binguh Bungah (8 days ago)
Sometimes keeping the secret is part of your character; you can confess to yourself, or God, and carry on not doing anything that requires more secrecy. Live learn and move on- in a forward and upward direction.
Antonio Rossi (8 days ago)
John Casti
E K (3 months ago)
The sad thing is that as you reveal these secrets and feel more alive, those unwilling to do so are pushed away, and, in my case, being wholly fulfilled as a human being, having no one.
Tony Williams (3 months ago)
Caucasians ... A human reaction or effect to your racists and hateful fictional cause is in no way on the same footing as your countless years of horrific atrocities you have inflicted on Indigenous people and their descendants around the world. So please save your weak attempts at your reverse racism comments because it makes you look even idiotic and maniacal than your history has already substantiated. Thank you!!
William Kiene (3 months ago)
2011? In 2018 the Blacks run the government in South Africa and they are going to take the land from the White farmers with no compensation. Now the lovely Blacks are killing the White farmers? Without any Whites, South Africa will completely fail, worse than Venezuela. So sad.......
Buket Erverdi (3 months ago)
this guy has really serious problems
tyler durden (3 months ago)
I knew I shouldn't have went down to the comments.. 😔 racists bs
x (4 months ago)
Here's the terrible secret nobody wants to share: Blacks and their liberal white enablers have destroyed South Africa and turned it into Chicago.
Shree harshavardhana619 (4 months ago)
What if someone dies of heart attack after hearing the secret ??
John O'Mara (5 months ago)
This guy is full of himself, but he’s honest about it, which is commendable. Good message overall.
James Fox (5 months ago)
Live or Live , which is which ??? one is to Go Live On a Stream the Other is to Live out your LIFE
Paul Davenport (5 months ago)
Did yall hear about the child that Hillary and Donald sired? The story will soon hit the news.
Анна К. (5 months ago)
"Welcome home" I cried
TheCarrifaery Bear (5 months ago)
me too! <3 it's ultimately what we all want to feel.
Kaarli Makela (5 months ago)
I relate to the message ... especially as I grew up in Detroit, and will forever value the 'urban' culture of Motown and the stunning events of the 60s ... on my street, we played, talked, shared, sang, danced and loved. My life ever since has been to dispel the illusions and lies about 'other' people. I wished heartily even as a child, that more people would have the courage to be open as I was as a third-grader. A great lesson ... don't fake the funk, get real, it is what it is. ... there's a place in the sun, where there's hope for everyone. Break out of YOUR 'bubble'. :) (y)
Doc Huard (5 months ago)
A.A. Step 9 - Made direct amends such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Releaving yourself of the burden and consequences of your secrets and lies CANNOT come at the expense of others.
JB B (5 months ago)
Too funny! Never made it to the end cause conversation don't make sense.
Komoso Daffin (6 months ago)
Who's the hateful person that made his voice so low.
Sam Zheng (6 months ago)
can he just stop BS please?
Dia Jasin (6 months ago)
That was irrelevant to me, I have nothing to hide.
Megan Hurley (6 months ago)
Now let’s hear a talk from a white farmer....
TheCarrifaery Bear (5 months ago)
oh junk.
Patrascu Lucian (6 months ago)
Plot hole in the email from that man: If he cannot break up with her because he is to afraid to hurt her, then why is he consider suicide? Isn't that going to hurt her too? I know, dark humor. I like the video message tho, It is an eye opener!
Alyssa JJ Thomas (6 months ago)
I think "The Confessional" exists for the purpose of cleansing one's soul and being authentic though it is supposed to be a confidential act. There's a good reason for that confidentiality. I like his passion for authenticity but the whole premise is too simplistic here. Even God has Secrets.
Karl D. Marx (7 months ago)
Just another "coach" ... Just telling something very evident without placing it within the societal context which is based on a web of lies.
thom1218 (7 months ago)
Clown alert...
mother goose (7 months ago)
Being alive is not your heart beating at 100miles per hour but simply explosion of thoughts.
onni borg (7 months ago)
I think the story he told was really touching, and what he said was honestly clever.
noga 1 (7 months ago)
i have a secret i keep from my mother . i can't tell her the truth , because she's very dramatic and judgemental , and she would kill me if she knew.
Rolando Sauceda (7 months ago)
God bless this mans courage and taking that leap of faith.....no pain no gain. He took all of his negative feelings and didn't pay any attention to it. His positive attitude and good intentions came through. This is a good story.... Let it be and rejoice. The lord Jesus Christ's presence clearly shined bright.
Dave George (7 months ago)
We all have separated by a few whom are falsely trusted
Li Baker (7 months ago)
This speech is so awesome! I cried because the method to achieve aliveness really works! I like the way he shape and perform the speech. Also very charming English! Very well reflect the beauty of a language.
absoftitanium (7 months ago)
What if I have no secrets? What if I'm not a liar?
TheCarrifaery Bear (5 months ago)
just don't lie to yourself.
TheCarrifaery Bear (5 months ago)
then you are free
LightDweller (8 months ago)
I’ve just discovered this video, and love it! Thank you so much... so refreshing, interesting and inspiring. I shall reflect on this, and I initially admit some truths to myself. Authenticity is definitely the way to liberation and aliveness. Just to add that I admire your courage to face your own fears, your story is deeply moving!
MRMehran (8 months ago)
You tell them your secrets and they own you
Bob A (8 months ago)
Hmm...you mean "the truth shall set you free?" Not the first time I have heard this. Cannot place my finger on it but I know it is an old book..
AMAN VERMA (8 months ago)
It is totally underestimated by many, that how much power a truth has. Sure it takes some real courage but the outcome is always worth it.
Mike Cotoia (8 months ago)
A lot of validity in practice is lost when Jesus is not included in the teachings of renewing ones self. Not the arbitrary definition of renewal but the truthful definition...
Saadi X (9 months ago)
No WE are ALL not liars. No thanks wtf? This is the problem with people. Note to humanity: don't associate with people that "keep secrets". They are the worst kind of humans/ things. Trust me because i'm proud to say I am not a liar. To the speaker, glad you discovered a little truth. Wow..
Lance Duchesneau (9 months ago)
Truly awesome talk!
Vincent Boateng (9 months ago)
Not really african liberal. More European invader
vlikeme (9 months ago)
I liked that secret. Being from India I seen something. In India I've never seen any muslim talk wrong about any other religion. I'm hindu as I was born in that family. Muslim, jain, sikh, hindu No one talks wrong about other religion or god. As I've seen throughout my experience muslims are more helpful and kind. Yes they r more attached and comfortable with their community. That doesn't mean they r bad. They follow their culture and tradition as everybody. That's my observation in India.
Ali Ifliss (9 months ago)
If the said secret causes you to live a double life, a mismatch between what you are and what you pretend to be, you should consider becoming what you pretend to be rather than uncovering what you are and thus indulging it. I mean, moral relativism is a plague and sharing our secrets to avoid the burden of becoming better is an awfull advice. You should consider that "what you are" isn't carved in stone and it sometimes needs to change.
amira zaid (9 months ago)
ترجمه عربي يا ناس
AnnaLynn Zinn, Ph.D. (9 months ago)
My life- long (67years) experiences, as well as Bible scripture tells us to Tell your secrets to no person. “Confess not your sins to any man.” My life-experiences have taught me to trust no one. People (humans) will gut you every chance they get. Keep to your own counsel.
Lee Borders (9 months ago)
This is hilarious more of you whites need to do this lmao, good job dude!
earth ocean (9 months ago)
SuperStokvis (10 months ago)
Great video .ive had the same experience
Ish Kabibble (10 months ago)
Titles like this are virtually as bad as click-bait.
Neo Dore (11 months ago)
This is exactly the problem with America today. That's why depression is on the raise.
pam emarald (11 months ago)
I have a secret that I feel Im too charismatic and I confuse people about my look and persona so they are never able to completely figure me out and like to know me and talk to me. As a result women admire me, like to befreind me but stab me at my back hahah since I'm a woman. It's hard for me to make reliable woman friends but I have sufficient so I'm secure; that's my secret hahah...thank u so much for making me more closer to myself!!!!
Roedy Green (11 months ago)
This is about overcoming racism.
James Blugen (9 months ago)
Roedy, Yes, this is about racism, BUT it is MORE too. He talked also about marriage and relationships. Please, apply these principles, if you choose, to more in your life than just racism. Thanks
And Do (1 year ago)
If everyone decides to be honest: lots of fathers will know that kids they raising aren't their own, and lots of children will know they've never met their biological father. Think about the leaders everyone loves to vote, industries that selling hopes. How about the Jung food industry ? Are we sure to face all the betrayal from 360° ?
Lis Engel (1 year ago)
Wonderfull talk about how honesty of what values you live by is the key to ALIVENESS that connect with the LIFE in all
Michael Cuddihy (1 year ago)
Maths puzzles
vsleboss cacakaka (1 year ago)
Before buying on gearbest, know that it's thieves. They do not repay, on google search for "Thieves Gearbest".
CrystalBallon (1 year ago)
Damn what is wrong with that comment section of ted talks nowadays......
omg hey there (1 year ago)
I never felt numb inside...I usually feel too much. I always wondered what that's like.
Aiassem (1 year ago)
Very interesting ! Informative! Also we should never discriminate anyone, very nice 👍
Vesa Llapaj (1 year ago)
the very best
An (1 year ago)
Donald Trump needed to listen to this presentation. What he is telling is so true. Thank you for sharing!
Pol Fartin (1 year ago)
fuckin moron
Dennis R. Levesque (1 year ago)
I dunno. It's not really that radical. "Knowing" that everybody lies, just means that even if you do tell the truth, nobody will believe you anyway. There's more money in Lie Detectors than there is in Truth Detectors. More people are interested in catching them, than in vindicating them. Nobody ever says, "Ah ha! I just caught you in a truth!".
Dr. Elizabeth Martin (1 year ago)
BEST, most moving TedTalk I've ever heard. Many thanks to Mr. Bruce Muzik and all who let this communication happen. BE ALIVE - don't LIE - to yourself or to others. Even the little ones! {"white lies" my problem - don't hurt someone's feelings....) Brilliant!
D J (1 year ago)
Great talk. He really wants to know who he is. He went to the extreme to discover himself...what a fulfilment!
Vandee Digitalis (1 year ago)
Its the objects of desire and materialism in the mind that creates the fear of death.VD
Vandee Digitalis (1 year ago)
Racism is an economic problem not the actual skIn color or looks (physical characteristics) of another human being it has nothing to do with any particular skin color at all.VD
Vandee Digitalis (1 year ago)
Don't give into materialism, Hollywood and share.VD
Azolio Eroach (1 year ago)
Aaaa, 🐂💩!
M M Foresight (1 year ago)
The true will set you free, and it looks like Mr. Muzik is now free.
Gino Asci (1 year ago)
Bruce is still telling lies.
Reverend Galerivs (1 year ago)
wow.. you are so special...
L. L. (1 year ago)
Sort of off topic, maybe, but . . . going from a single white male living alone in his apartment into a neighborhood where everybody eats breakfast out on the street - WTF!?!?!? - and where a little a kid feels /is safe enough to walk up and talk to a total stranger, and it's considered socially acceptable to do so . . . That in itself is gonna be a life-changer for someone coming from a numbing society. Props to the neighborhood he moved into, that their culture was an 'alive' culture (often the silver lining of abject poverty). If they'd all had white skin but been identical otherwise, they could've cured him anyway - not of racism, but of "numbness." Maybe we should all eat breakfast in our front yards! Great story. Wonder where the little boy is today?
Cool. Keep going - remember there is arrested development.
Richard Fauvelle (1 year ago)
Good god man what a miss leading title.
Ranginie Chetty (1 year ago)
well done Bruce
Tomasina Covell (1 year ago)
Sure like he still lives with the blakes... LOL I've got less interest in helping the blakes now, they're all full of BS and just want to run games on you and rip you off.
JD-Hi-Hello (1 year ago)
Thank you.
Samuel Atkins (1 year ago)
His wife "amazingly" met the man of her dreams one week later. Riiiight
Clint Eastwood (1 year ago)
tell people you are a drug addict and see how they judge, distrust and change on you!!
Cindy Mulvey (1 year ago)
It Ali about racer? That's the only thing not heard. Liberals seem to be racist, after this US election that has been revealed ten fold?
sandra andpatch (1 year ago)
Ok, I listened up until you told me you cheated on your wife for 3 YEARS! Seriously Red Flag...NARCISSIST. Goodbye :)
Daniel Scott (1 year ago)
Oh my God could this guy be more full of himself. Ugh.
Graehame Thorne (1 year ago)
The fool who made this video is gonna end up violently DEAD. Stereotypes exist for a REASON. It's far better to wait in the reception area for half an hour than to walk out to your car in the parking lot thru a group of blacks & get attacked. You can get away with it for a hundred times, but it only takes ONCE.
contrarian duude (1 year ago)
......Yawns >>>wants the 20 minutes back....and that's my truth
budha tony bodhisatva (1 year ago)
umm,I have a suggestion...if I was to be truthful,and by being truthful if hurting another person in the process would ensu them suffering,then not rite course of action..thought of doing is greater!! than doing..namaaste!!!
Елизавета A. (1 year ago)
Neil Salmon (1 year ago)
psychobabble that is a waste to listen to this nonsense .
blu henriquez (1 year ago)
❤this was sooooooo amazing ❤
driley driley (1 year ago)
While the whole stereotype thing is good to challenge on an individual level, what about the opposite? (ANOTHER thing that no one wants to talk about?) Why is it "bad" for a white guy (family) to be scared of what black people presumably do, but yet it's okay for a black person (family) to presume they KNOW every white person, that we're all racist (just ASK them!), and that we all need to be executed, that we're all privileged (apparently, most blacks have never heard of the millions living in the bluegrass/hill area of Kentucky)? Why is it okay for ANYONE that's black to say/do whatever they want... because they're not white? Political correctness has NEVER addressed a SANE appreciation for this: certain people behave badly, most behave pretty well on a normal basis. If you want ANYONE to stop being afraid of black people, then start with getting the mainstream media to stop reporting on all the crime of the worst neighborhoods in virtually every large city in the country!!!
Eyjolfur Kari (1 year ago)
"Look they are just like us"
Liberallez (1 year ago)
Will all the guilt merchants please just Shut The Hell Up!!! The real racism is the constant yammering about how "I'm really a racist because I don't constantly perceive myself as a racist."
Lalit Mavi (1 year ago)
But to whom shall I tell the secret .. ? if I afraid of someone or something or the wrongdoings that I have done, with whom shall I share the secret ?
Liberated Amon (1 year ago)
What did i learn from this talk? South Africans call hoses hose pipes.
JW P (1 year ago)
Having black friends means nothing.
The Man Next Door (1 year ago)
I'm not agree. You can open your heart if you have some secrets. There are things that you can't share with others, and that is called "private life".
Jo Montanee (1 year ago)
This is, to me, by far the most beautiful speech of Ted Talk history. "Welcome home" part makes me teary.
Nomad Black (1 year ago)
Do a movie about your story
24/7/365 (1 year ago)
he is a white piece of trash
Joe W (1 year ago)
Joe W (1 year ago)
Joe W (1 year ago)

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